Friday, September 24, 2010

The Cute Friend of the Cripled Girl I Hooked Up With Who Wasn't Actually Two People

So last night my female attention whore of a dog jumped onto the kitchen table and ate my dinner. She then proceeded to throw it up on the kitchen floor, so I locked her upstairs and let the puppy run free. Then I made Hn1 clean up the vomit.

Anyway, we went out, Me, Beard, Hn1 and Bigirl, Beard trying to get with Bigirl now. We were in Clubbar when we ran into Cripple and CCG2 so I bought them shots. Then we started talking, I actually didn't recognize Cripple at first because she is no longer crippled, but I was saying that I seem to see her out all the time and we should hang out more often.

So CCG2 keeps saying how I'm really nice and insists on me giving her my number, so she takes it down and calls me....And well, this is where I see the effects alcohol have on me....see, CCG2 has the same exact first name as CCG1, the same exact friend on crutches as CCG1, and apparently, as I learned last night, the same exact phone number. So yes, There is only one CCG, although it was cool to think that Cripple had two friends with the same first name that I hooked up with, I guess this makes a shitload of more sense.

Then Hn1 runs into Kingtool who recognizes me and buys me a couple of shots, which was pretty cool. Then I saw Jegabombs and he buys me a couple of shots. Then I saw our friend Greg, who I hang out with a lot recently, and he buys me a couple of shots.

So anyway, Beard went home with Bigirl and Greg and I went to Chillbar where we met up with Georgia and, apparently, I angered some black guy who was trying to get with her, but Greg and a few other rugby buddies told him to fuck off, so he did.

Anyway, Greg and I were at the bar and this hot but ridiculously drunk girl is standing next to us. So Greg points to me and tells the girl I need a kiss. Next thing I know, I'm making out with a hot drunk stranger who I didn't say a single word to.

Then I somehow got a ride home with Hn1 and her boyfriend, but there were like eight of us in a van, and I didn't know any of them, and if I ever saw any of them again, I feel like I still wouldn't know them. But anyway, I get home to where Tim's girlfriend is about to walk the dogs, but me, drunk, offers to do it instead. So she puts the dogs on their leashes and hands them to me, to which I reply, "What the fuck is this?" And she goes, "Um...the dogs?"

Also, by this point, CCG(1and2) is talking to me via text and she says "Most guys would fuck a girl before going on a date with her." So I had to reply by saying I wouldn' we have a date set up for I don't know when, which I guess is pretty cool.

That's pretty much my night.